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changing schools is so weird, because why am i always thinking about the what ifs? my first high school, an art school felt like the perfect place for me at first. the problem was how unorganised it was, so now i'm in a normal high school, studying medicine. i am happy here. i met some wonderful people. but what if i stayed in the previous one? i could be so much more open about my creativity. no one judged me for liking dramatic movies and dressing differently. i wasn't even scared to come out to my classmates, while i am to tell it to my parents. i miss daily train and tram rides, randomly going to malls and thrift stores, i miss the whole mess around the city. now i feel normal. i don't know if i like feeling normal. my classmates don't hate me, but if they found out it's their last time seeing me, they wouldn't care. in my previous class even the popular girl came to say bye and almost started crying. i'm really glad i met some people though. they feel like real friends. i just wish we could have what i did in the city. i miss not caring about tomorrow, not telling our parents where we are going, just living the moment. i wish i could just have these two worlds at the same time.