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girl ilysm thank you for sending me videos of her tiktok even if I didn't ask😭😭 i was lwk wondering how she was and im super happy to know that she's living her best life. I didn't wanna view her account bc i didn't want her to know it was me, + I also deleted tiktok soo... but anyways seeing those videos seriously grounded me and stopped me from reducing her to my own perspective. yeah, she has her own life with friends who are actually amazing to her and she deserves alllll of it. even if we weren't the best friends to each other I don't want to think of her as horrible. and I kinda realised that she might also not even think of me alot🥲 I still wish that I greeted her on her bday though like she did on mine. I don't know what she thinks of me now, or ever; some voice inside me keeps trying to say that she sent that bday message to make herself feel better—but then again it's just my own insecurities talking. i always felt lesser than her, when we were still friends. ig she was just the bigger person in the end and I regret the way I treated her all this time. it's almost been a year since we last spoke. probably my first experience of genuine heartbreak was losing her. we knew each other since kindergarten and genuinely thought we would be inseperable.