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I don't even know what to write about because there is just so much going on in my life. I feel so depressed and lonely. I've never SH but I get the thoughts of "they'll be better off w/o me" or "I wish I was never here" stuff like that. Just the hopelessness bs. I feel so trapped with no way out and no mental safe place to go. Physically I'm safe but mentally and emotionally I'm not because I've had so much happen in my life the last seven months and I just feel so trapped. I can't really go to family because sooner or later I'm sure they'd stab my back and go to my mom but I need a long term place to go, not just a temporary thing like I'm there for a couple days then back home because that doesn't help me long term with healing. Idk what to do at all right now... But anyways my name is Vivian or Viv for short 🌀