I don’t know what to feel about my mom who has abused me ever since as long as I can remember all in physical emotional and verbal abuse too and now every-time I whisper to myself I hate her another part of me instantly feels so guilty like I’m caught in the middle red handed commit a grave sin bc religion that they taught us was to respect your parents no matter what they did or said. Even thoigh not even half of it is true. I hate her but idk if I coukd ever actually fully admit that outloud either idk I hate myself most